4/13/2010

Trials

We all get trials in our lives. They make us grow and become stronger. They build relationships that are good for us. Hopefully we don't get into bad relationships. If you are in a relationship or situation that is getting you no where or is bringing you down then chances are something needs to change. We all should take time out of our busy lives to evaluate what is going wrong and how we can change it. We also should sit down and take a look at ourselves. One thing I try to do is always be myself. It is hard sometimes to live up to the standards I know I want to live and to be the person I know I am inside. But I still try. I try to do what is right and what I know will attract the right kind of people to me. I hope to be a great example to others.
I am sick of attracting guys who just want me for the physical aspects of a relationship. They aren't the kind of guys I want to marry. They aren't the type that can take me through the temple. I know I'm not a horrible person at all, but something about my attitude or the way I act around guys or something in my appearance needs to change so that I can attract the type of guy that is going to be able to take me to the temple. I am currently working on that. I am also trying to stay out of a relationship. I am mad at guys for being stupid and jerks. (Not ALL guys but I don't want to deal with any right now.) So far I'm doing good but we'll see what happens when I move to Provo and get thrust into that dating atmosphere. But hey, I'll keep it up for as long as I can. I know some people think I'm too much of a flirt and me being single wont last long but to them I say HA! I am changing that right now! :p
I really wish I could sell my contract. I have been trying for forever now! And it sucks because I keep getting people that want it but then they change their minds and don't want it anymore. And it sucks because I tell the managers that someone wants it but then I have to turn around and tell them that the person changed their mind. This has happened at least four times now. Very annoying! :/ So please friends, pray for me to get rid of this contract! I feel that I need to be in Provo in May sometime and this is probably a trial I just have to get through, but its hard! I need help! So I pray. And pray, and pray! I know it'll be sold soon enough but it is still annoying. GRR!
I wish I wasn't scared to sing in front of people. I LOVE to sing!! But that fear of messing up in front of people makes it so I cant go up and sing in front of people. I am trying so hard to get over that but its coming slowly. I had a friend who was going to help me with that but then he moved away. :( Sad day I know. But its ok I'll get over it on my own haha. Maybe. Eventually. I am going to take voice lessons at UVU. :) It is awesome!! Or will be haha. I am excited! But anyways I am done writing now. I'll update more some other time.

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